Monday, May 08, 2006

Drive Friendly

Bah, humbug.

I am a good driver, thank God. That's all that saved me this afternoon. I was cruising along Highway 71 and had just made the curve where Hwy 71 and Hwy 183 part company, with 183 heading south to Lockhart and 71 heading east to Bastrop.

Some lunatic moron in the far right lane decided that he just had to make the exit on the far left. Zoom, zoom and I found myself staring at his rear bumper. My reflexes kicked in and I made the necessary adjustment to keep from plowing into his vehicle. It was close.

I was livid. Over the years I have managed to tame my inner bitch. Well, I've learned to control her a little better. But she is alive and well, let me tell you. She blasted the S.O.B. with her horn, accelerated and pulled up next to him, laid on the horn continuously when she got even with him and gave him the old one finger salute and a good cussing.

He's probably still laughing at Granny Grunt's little tirade.

I am way tired of incompetent drivers. I've come to the conclusion that about 90% of the drivers on the road should have their licenses revoked and be restricted to riding public transportation. Come to think of it, that would not only clear the road of dangerous, insane drivers, it might even cause gas prices to go down. Excellent idea all around.

I love to drive, but I hate idiots. If that particular idiot had tried that particular maneuver on a less experienced driver, there would have been a traffic jam deluxe while Star Flight and the Jaws of Life made their way to the scene. Next time he may not be so lucky. Hopefully he will only kill himself when the time comes.

Drive friendly, hah. Drive competently and I'll be your friend. Drive like an idiot and I'll put the evil eye on you.


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